The Machine Gun Preacher
THE MACHINE GUN PREACHER
“Was that the best you could do?” Buabasah asked furiously. “There were people in the house too, you know. Her parents, visitors, servants! Couldn’t you have shouted, huh? You could have shouted, and people would have come around!”
The pastor regarded the older man with a wry smile playing on his handsome face.
“So, I scream, and she also screams, and the door is broken down,” he said quietly. “She claiming I was trying to rape her, me claiming she was trying to seduce me. Who would you believe? Who would anyone believe?”
Buabasah spread his arms a couple of times, but could not speak for a moment.
“So, of all the places on her body, it was only the girl’s vagina you could kick?”
“Why are you so interested in where I kicked, Mr. Buabasah?” the pastor asked with a little chuckle.
“Because you’re going to court, if you don’t know the gravity of what you’ve done yet!” Buabasah exploded. “I need to know everything! I’ve been appointed by the church to represent you, so I have to know how the hell I’m going to do just that!”
“You don’t have to worry about that,” the young man said quietly. “Stop behaving as if going to court is an outrage.”
“It is an outrage against the church, you fool!” Buabasah said harshly as his anger peaked. “A naked pastor kicking a poor girl in her privates hard enough to hospitalize her! You’re dragging the name of the church into disrepute!”
“Disrepute, lawyer!” the young pastor said softly, but his eyes were now cold with fury as he leaned forward. “Even our Lord Jesus Christ was dragged before Pontius Pilate, judged guilty, and crucified! Going to court because I defended myself against fornication of the worst kind does not fill me with regret! You can choose not to defend me because I don’t really give a damn!”
“Oh, you’re going to jail, you imbecile!” the lawyer hissed.
“You insult me one more time and I swear I’ll hit you in your throat!” Jon Fii said, and his voice was now cold with fury as he glared at Buabasah.
Buabasah opened his mouth and looked at the young man with shock.
That was the last thing he had expected, and to hear it stated so boldly, with such animosity, filled him with shock.
He shook his head, numb and stunned.
“You’re not a pastor,” he said softly. “They should just take your license and your clerical and let you become a boxer!”
“Now you’re being simply boring, lawyer,” Jon Fii said in a much calmer voice. “Even Jesus was whipping people in the church. Does that mean Jesus Christ should have been boxer? Now, do you have a bail for me or not?”
Lawyer Buabasah sighed deeply.
“Oh stop that Jesus-Jesus thing!” Buabasah shouted furiously. “Can you compare yourself with our Lord? Do you know that after this case, whatever happens, I’m going to meet the Executives and brief them on this? Do you know that you could be in a lot of trouble if I report negatively on your behavior, young man?”
“So what?” Jon Fii asked softly. “You want me to lick your shoes?”
“The cheek of it!” Buabasah exploded. “You have to show some respect, young man! Learn how to speak to your elders!”
The young man sighed and leaned forward.
“Sorry if you’re hurt, Mr. Buabasah, but respect is reciprocal. You just threatened me, and that was not a nice thing to do.”
“Threatened you?” Buabasah retorted angrily. “You don’t understand the kind of trouble you’re in, do you? Without me, you’ll end up in jail for certain.”
“And what’s wrong with that?” Jon Fii asked calmly. “Joseph fled from a woman and ended up in prison, so if I kick a woman in the pussy and end up in prison, what’s the big deal?”
“Is that what you’re telling me, Pastor Jon Fii?”
“Exactly, Mr. Buabasah,” the young pastor said. “You don’t control my destiny. If I end up in prison, then that’s where the Lord wants me, and if I walk free, that’ll be the doing of the Lord. So, you can go and send your report to the Executives as you wish, because my destiny does not lie in your hands.”
He stood up and walked out of the office, and the flummoxed lawyer stared after him with a gaping mouth.
The headquarters of The Eden International Church, TEIC, was an imposing figure set majestically in the center of the city. It was a glass-fronted twelve-story edifice with a tubular elevator system beautifully crafted outside the building itself.
A gigantic courtyard had a baptismal pool area, an exotic garden, a cafeteria, and a car park.
The huge building housed administrative offices, research libraries, conference halls, cinema areas, and transit bedrooms.
There was a high-profile meeting going on in one of the mini conference halls on the tenth floor.
This conference room had a beautiful glass-topped oval conference table around which were huge, comfortable swivel chairs. The chair at the head of the conference table was bigger, elaborate and commanded authority, and sitting on it was the Chairman of the church, Apostle Gilbert Ayeh.
On his left was the General Secretary, Apostle Francis Tetteh. There was also the International Outreach Director, Evangelist Joseph Duncan. There were three other high-ranking apostles of the church with them.
At the foot of the table was Lawyer Ben Buabasah, who was dressed in a wine suit and yellow shirt with a wine necktie.
His briefcase was on the floor beside him, and in front of him were a few sheets of paper.
The men, all dressed in black suits and wearing clerical collars, looked at the lawyer with cold, stunned faces.
“So, after that gross disrespect he showed towards you, what happened at the trial today?” Apostle Duncan asked coldly.
Buabasah sighed and rubbed his face.
“That was when it all became quite baffling,” he continued. “The case was called at the circuit court with a circuit judge in charge. Everything went smoothly, and the prosecutor called in the lady, Akua Mintah. She was sworn in, and then the judge told her to narrate what happened to her.”
Buabasah stopped and shook his head slightly.
The men of God continued to look at her.
“Are you alright, Elder Buabasah?” the chairman asked softly.
Buabasah nodded as he took a sip of water from the small bottle in front of him.
“Yes, Chairman,” he said as he set the bottle carefully down on the table. “Well, the girl stood up and ran away.”
There was sudden silence in conference room.
“What did you say?” Apostle Tetteh asked.
“That’s what I heard too,” Apostle Amago said. “I couldn’t believe it. Elder Mintah called and informed me that his daughter fled from the dock, He chased her and asked her what was wrong.”
“And what did she say was the matter with her?” the Chairman asked.
Apostle Amago shrugged.
“The girl simply said she could not look at Pastor Jon Fii,” he answered. “That’s what Elder Mintah told me anyway.”
“Obviously that was the first explanation,” Buabasah said. “The judge assumed that she was traumatized by the experience, and so he asked Pastor Jon Fii to be escorted out of the court so that the girl’s testimony could be taken.”
“And what happened when Jon was taken out?” Apostle Duncan asked.
“The girl stood up and ran away again,” Buabasah said.
“Even though Jon Fii was not in the courtroom?” the Chairman asked.
“Yes, Chairman,” Buabasah said softly. “They brought her back again, and the judge asked her to come and sit near him to give her testimony in an obvious attempt to calm her.”
“And did that calm her?” Apostle Tetteh asked.
“On the contrary,” Buabasah said in a confused voice. “She sat there beside the judge and told him she wanted to sleep with Pastor Jon Fii. She pulled off his towel, and then he kicked her something-something. That girl confirmed the pastor’s story.”
“My goodness,” the Chairman said softly.
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