(American Ghanaian Setting)
Roy: Promise me you will not scream or freak out when I tell you who the captain’s band was given to.
Glenn: Stop beating about the busy and hit right on the head of the nail. Who the f**k did the coach give my captain’s band to? I have worked my ass out over the years for this band and now that I am just an inch to it, I won’t have someone double-crossing me for it.
Roy: Calm down, Glenn.
Glenn: Don’t tell me to calm down, Roy. I said who the f**k has been awarded my position?
Roy: I was reliably informed by the coach that Richmond Gallagher will be acting as the captain of the team in the coming days.
Glenn: And who the f**k is Richmond Gallagher?
Roy: He is one of our juniors who joined the basketball team this semester.
Glenn: What the f**k? So the damn coach had no shame and decency than to insult us the seniors in the team? Couldn’t he even at least award the band to any of the senior players of the team rather than giving the band to a junior who joined the team just this semester? How many of the juniors even have the privilege to use the same dressing room with us? This shit must be addressed and whoever this idiot called Richmond Gallagher is, he has a score to settle with me big time.
Roy: (checks in the dressing room to see if they are alone) I am happy to hear you say you will fight for that captain’s band. I registered my displeasure to the coach but he only told me that, Richmond Gallagher has his full support to reprimand us the seniors when we go wrong.
Glenn: We shall see how he will throw instructions around after I am done with him. I will so deal with him that he will not be part of this team when the tournament starts. Roy, I swear I will make the life of that double-crossing bastard a living hell. He will regret ever coming to this school to the extent of joining the basketball team. Since the coach has dared tried to make a mockery out of me in this school, I will deal with him ruthlessly.
Roy: I love it when you take charge of matters and you know I am always behind you when you try to take revenge or you want to pull down the pants of any girl in this school. Let me quickly shower so that we go to class, as the water runs on my body, I will map out a counter strategy that we will be using for that fool and also how to swerve the wrath of Fiona’s Dad.
Glenn: That is very necessary dude.
Brown’s Residence:
Captain Brown: By the time I am done with you, you will run when you see the shadow of the opposite sex.
Fiona: Dad you are infringing on my happiness and human rights.
Captain Brown: (wipes the stains on his dress) Would you shut the gutter you call your mouth? When did sexual preference start to rock shoulders with human rights? You had the audacity to bring your boyfriend to my house and as if that is not enough, you took him to my matrimonial bedroom to have sex with him on the bed I share with my wife. Oooh, you overstepped your boundary and because of that, I will have no option but to send you to that girls boarding school close to the air force base.
Fiona: (in tears) Daddy you can’t do that to me.
Captain Brown: Watch me and if you think you have a say in this matter then you are daydreaming.
Mrs Brown: (opens the door) Honey, your call sounded urgent. Hope all is well?
Captain Brown: Ask your prostitute of a daughter what she was doing in our bedroom with that vagabond.
Mrs Brown: Ain’t you supposed to be in school by now, young lady?
Captain Brown: Can you imagine I left my access card in the house so I decided to come get it only to come and meet this cheap harlot having sex with an idiot in our bedroom?
Mrs Brown: (holds her mouth) My goodness!! Fiona when did you become so disrespectful to the extent of bringing your boyfriend to this house and as if that is not enough, you invite him into the bedroom your father and I share?
Captain Brown: What baffles my mind is that she was supposed to be in class by now but she break the bounds to invite her foolish boyfriend to my house knowing very well that none of us will be in the house.
Mrs Brown: Actually she delayed this morning when we were preparing to leave the house so she told me she will join a bus to school not knowing she had everything figured out. I was so wrong to think my daughter is naive but she has now proven to me that, she knows what is sweet and sour.
Captain Brown: Get this message across to your harlot of a daughter that from next semester, I am enrolling her in that girls boarding school close to the air force base and nothing will change my mind. I wanted to chase that idiot who had the audacity to come to my house and defile my matrimonial bedroom but I just realized he didn’t force his way to that room but rather my silly daughter gave him the permission to do that. I have phoned the base to inform them that I am not coming to work because of a serious family problem which requires my utmost attention. I am hereby driving straight to that school to make enquiries on her behalf. The sight of her alone makes me want to strangle her. (picks his car keys)
Mrs Brown: And what poured into your uniform?
Captain Brown: Can you imagine that idiot splashed his sperm on me the moment I entered the room? Let me go and change myself as I visit her upcoming school. (climbs the staircase)
Mrs Brown: Fiona this is not how your Dad and I raised you so where at all did you learn this bad attitude from? Do you want to make a mockery out of this family?
Captain Brown: (descends the staircase) On third thought, I will like to meet that silly boy who had the effrontery to come to my house and soil my matrimonial bed. Woman talk to your daughter and get information from her, I don’t want to come back to this house for me to hear any long stories. I want to know the identity of that idiot and who his parents are. If his parents are wayward and couldn’t raise him well, playing behind my house was a very bad idea for him. As I said earlier, I don’t want to come and hear any stories from both of you. (slams the door behind him)
Mrs Brown: I believe you are happy now, Fiona. I can see the excitement all over your face because I am not seeing any traits of remorse on your face. You have the temerity and the courage to invite a boy into my house to transact your illegal business right under my nose. By the time I am through with you in this house, you will wonder if I am truly your mother. See the way you gave your Dad the chance to speak to me anyhow as if I was the one who orchestrated and executed your silly act. Today will be the last day that I will leave you alone to be in this house because I have come to realize that you are no longer the small girl I thought you were. Thank you so much for enlightening me on the real personality that you have hidden behind that small innocent face of yours. Now, get out of my side before I pounce on you. (Fiona climbs the staircase to her room)
Captain Brown: (talks to himself in his car) Damn you, Fiona!! Can you imagine me parading her everywhere in the base that my only daughter is a virgin and a very good girl, not knowing she was already a pro who invites her clients to come to her doorstep for her to service them? I should have squeezed the life out of her and that dimwit. Oooh, I have been so insulted by this girl and I can’t just forgive her for that. I will have to punish her in the way that when she sees the shadow of a man coming her way, she will run for her life. Yes, I know what exactly to do and may God forgive me for what I am about to do.
Back at the Dressing Room:
Roy: Dude a nice idea came to my head whilst I was under the shower and I want to let you know it.
Glenn: Spill it out, my guy.
Roy: (goes to check if there are other souls in the dressing room) How about we deal with that idiot the way we do to people who try to double-cross us? You know our normal way of paying people to visit when they step on our toes. (licks his lips)
Glenn: Oh you mean we have to visit him and have a man-to-man talk with him and if he proves stubborn, then we show him that when muscles intersect, force is applied.
Roy: Exactly so, my future basketball captain.
Glenn: So when should we make the move?
Roy: Are you asking when? You know patience is not one of my virtues and in matters like this, every single second counts. Let’s strike when the iron is hot for us to get the desired results. I believe after our man-to-man talk with him, he will gladly decline that captain’s band from Coach Ross.
Glenn: But for that coach, at the appropriate time, I know what to do to him. I will so deal with him even before we start the tournament. No one steps on the tail of the viper and goes free without tasting its venom. I will bite him when he least expects and it’s then that he will know, no one messes with Glenn Smith.
Roy: (very excited) I love it when you display your level of wickedness. Dude, let’s go to class, I believe by now the maths teacher will be in.
Glenn: Honestly I am not in the mood for any class today. My day has been ruined already and I haven’t done the assignment that man gave us. I wouldn’t like him to start telling stories about how he and my Dad loved maths during their days in school.
Roy: So what are you going to do now?
Glenn: I will be at the library until we close, who knows if Fiona and his Dad will come looking for me in the classroom?
Roy: My guy looks scared.
Glenn: Hey don’t forget the man is in the army and if you see his stature, you won’t be saying what you are saying. Taking precautions is not a sign of cowardice.
Roy: Well you have a great point there and I side with you on your position on this matter.
Glenn: I came to school with my phone today so if anything, you can send me a message so I revert.
Roy: You did that today?
Glenn: Yeah because I was communicating with Fiona by then.
At the Hotel:
Selina: (on phone) Baby girl, you need to see how beautiful this place is, I have always told you to move out of your comfort zone but you keep giving flimsy excuses not to join me so I hook you up with these bankrollers, movers and shakers of this state.
Lacey: Selina I have always told you that I am not into material things. I am so content with Phil and I know that in God’s own time, he will establish him well.
Selina: Be there and be quoting sermons for me. When was the last time you wore a new designer blouse or even dress? When was the last time your handsome Phil took you to a restaurant to have dinner? When was the last time that he gave you an expensive perfume as a gift? When was the last…
Lacey: (cuts in) Selina whatever you are enjoying over there, I am not interested. You should know me better by now as we have been friends for over a decade. I am not moved by material things and I don’t envy what my fellow woman has. I prefer working myself to get what I want rather than sticking to a married man and milking him dry. Listen, what I won’t be happy of if done to me, I won’t do it to my fellow woman. We always say karma is a bitch but for me, I am of the view that karma is a snitch, we only reap what we sow so one day, if a young lady snatches your man from you don’t be mad at her.
Selina: I don’t know why broke people are so proud and arrogant. What has been motivating you poor people at all? I was only trying to make you see the light and you want to turn around and rain insults on me indirectly.
Lacey: Selina, I never told you I was blind and couldn’t see ahead of me. I want to register my displeasure towards that light of yours and if that is how your light looks like, then I will prefer being in the dark all my life. If you don’t mind, I have some customers that I need to attend to. Enjoy yourself while it lasts, my dear friend. (ends the call)
Selina: (talks to herself) Did this wretched lady just cut the call on me whilst I took the pains to call her? But what even motivated me to call her in the first place knowing the bad energy she has towards this sugar daddy and married men agenda? Well, I don’t blame her, I blame myself for associating myself with such a lowlife like her. I only wanted to upgrade her to my level but if she is adamant and stubborn, I will leave her to enjoy her boring lifestyle all by herself. After all, whatever she has is hers and whatever I have is also mine and mine alone. Let me see her take any of my belongings when I get back and that is when she will know the real personality behind my beautiful face. Let me quickly dress up for the afternoon tour.
Lacey: Sorry for keeping you waiting ma’am. What can I get for you?
Customer: My daughter, I like the way you spoke to your friend on the phone. I know it doesn’t concern me but I couldn’t help than to admire your courage and zeal to stand by your words and work hard to get whatever you want. Most of you young folks of today always want an easy way to the top so you always look for shortcuts forgetting how dangerous that path can be. All that glitters is not gold and on that note, I will like you to give me my usual.
Lacey: It will be ready in the next 5 minutes. Please take your seat as I make your order for you.
Customer: Thank you so much, my dear. It’s always a delight when you attend to me and today I will tell you one secret, the day you stop working here, this ice cream shop will lose one customer which happens to be me.
Lacey: Oh, please don’t say that, ma’am.
Customer: My dear look at me very well, I am 65 years and I come to this place often because of the beautiful way you receive customers. I don’t always eat the ice cream I buy from here but with that beautiful smile you are having on your pretty face, I come here often so I can see it. I usually give the ice cream to the kids who leave next door.
Lacey: I feel flattered by your words ma’am.
Customer: Don’t be my dear, I am known for speaking the truth and my mind always. I am not known to be the person who beats about the bush. I say it how it is and when it matters.
Karl: (walks in) Mom what are you doing here?
Lacey: Good afternoon Sir.
Karl: Hello Lacey, let me finish with my mom first.
Customer: Did you have to come in at this time? You just blew my cover.
Lacey: Sir please do you know my customer?
Karl: Your customer happens to be the owner of this shop. I inherited it from her 5years ago when she decided to retire for me to take over from her.
Lacey: Oh my goodness!! She has been coming here often to buy ice cream from me at least twice in a week.
Karl: Mom you come all the way to this place to buy ice cream whilst there is another branch which is just 6 blocks away from your house?
Customer: I come here because of this beautiful lady and her ice cream taste better than the one close to my house. You better check on the recipe they use over there before you lose your customers. Their ice cream taste like pudding mixed with sugar. Now that you have reviewed my identity to my beautiful friend here, I can’t come over and purchase my ice cream again in peace.
Karl: If it’s this very ice cream you want, I can get the delivery guys to deliver some to you every single day.
Customer: Hey don’t be silly, I am not handicapped at the moment. When I come here, it’s equally a form of exercise for me.
Karl: Okay so where did you park your car?
Customer: Actually I walked to this place.
Karl: Lord have mercy. Mom you walked for close to a mile just to purchase ice cream. You are so unpredictable and if you were not my mom, I will mistake you for something else.
Lacey: Ma’am please here you go with your order.
Customer: Thank you very much my pretty lady. I will see you some other time.
Karl: Let me take you home mom.
Customer: Don’t be silly young man, do I look incapacitated? I came here all by myself and I am going back home all by myself. If you want to see me, you can take the lead home and I will join you later. I am not in contention with anyone so allow me burn calories and the fats in my body.
Karl: I have heard you mom, I will pass by this evening when I close from here. If it wont be too much of a bother to you, I would love to eat my favourite jollof from your end.
Customer: Since you remain my son and my responsibility, consider it done and do well to come home early. I don’t stay up late lately.
Karl: I have heard you my sweet 16. Thank you for being there for me always.
To be continued…………………………………………………………………………………………………#Yeb3toaso
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